Farewell 2015

I know I have been a little MIA in the blog world lately. With getting promoted, finishing the wedding planning, getting married, buying a house, moving into said house, honeymoon and every other little thing in between it has been a pretty crazy last few months. But, because the main reason I started this blog was to log my own goals, successes and failures, I only found it fitting that I needed to follow up with my 2015 goals and set some new goals.

Last year I posted all of my goals for 2015 broken down into categories: financial, family and personal.

I have to say when I went into 2015 I was not expecting to meet as many of these goals as I did. I was expecting to get close but still be working on quite a few of them. I am so happy to say that with the help of my family and my amazing husband, together we have accomplished so much and have come up with even more goals and plans for 2016!

So here’s how 2015 ended up…

Financial Goals:

Have all wedding money saved by July 2015
Nailed it! We were able to pay for all parts of our wedding in cash and made it through debt free!

Have a $500 Cash Emergency Fund by July 2015
Exceeded it! We currently have a $1000 cash emergency fund stashed away for those what if’s, on top of a second savings in another savings account.

Open a Joint Account for Wedding Savings and Future Use by July 2015
Done! Joint account is up and running with both of our paychecks being direct deposited! We also earned $150 by signing up with our bank and setting up those direct deposits. Not bad!

All Debt except for Car and Student Loans paid off by July 2015
Nailed it! We are currently paying off my car and student loans but all other debt is paid off. We do accrue a monthly credit card bill but we are able to pay it off in full each month.

Have Half of a Down Payment Saved for our House by September 2015
Exceeded it! We bought a house the week after Labor Day and moved in officially the week after we got back from our honeymoon!

Family Goals:

Schedule family time at least every other weekend
I wouldn’t say that we scheduled time but now that Joe and I are living in our own place we do make a point of having dinner with my family at least once a week.

Schedule at least one date a month
Again, I don’t think we actually scheduled dates but we do make sure we go out just the two of us at least once a month.

Personal Goals:

Maintain a GPA of 3.5 or higher at GCU
I fell short on this one a bit. With the promotion at work I slacked off a bit on my schoolwork. I have still passed all of my classes but they were not the straight A’s I was hoping for. Only 8 more classes until I graduate and I know I can finish strong!

Move up at Work
Nailed it! I got the lead position at work and will be applying for the next supervisor position to move up again here soon!

Be at least a Level 2 SCUBA Diver
Nailed it! We got to dive in Hawaii while on our honeymoon that got me a few more dives logged which let me hit level 2.

Engage More
I have to say I honestly don’t think I engaged as much as I could have this year, at least not on social media.  I did however form amazing relationships with some people at work and I am so thankful for those real life friendships that I have made.

Attend Super Saturday with Becky and Explore Beach Body
Done. I attended a Super Saturday with Becky and did look into Beach Body a lot this year. Although I decided it wasn’t the route for me, it did lead me to look into something that I really am passionate about and I am now working on that idea.

Read More
Although I did read a lot this year, I am not happy with how much I didn’t read. I wanted to tackle the 2015 reading challenge and honestly didn’t get to very many of the books on that list. I picked up one of them and fell in love with the author’s writing and therefore had to read all the rest of the books she’s written. I clearly have a type when it comes to books.

Family Projects

Family has always been extremely important to me.  My mom is my best friend, my dad my greatest protector and my brother my partner in crime.  The four of us are quite a tightly knit group and that may have made me seem odd when I was younger but now that I’m in my twenties I appreciate it.  When I was younger and kids at school would ask me what I was doing over the weekend I would always respond with “I’m not sure, something with my family” and I would always get this look that made me feel weird.  Now at 24 when I answer my friends the same way they look at me with envy.
When my fiancé Joe started hanging around on the weekends with my family I started realizing that he was going to fit in just fine as well.  Yes my parents’ and brother’s opinions meant something to me and when they gave the stamp of approval without even knowing it I knew Joe would become a second son to my parents and a brother to mine.  So now we are a nice little family of five and although we get busy and don’t always have as much time for each other as we usually do we still know that we will always be there for each other when needed.
These past few weekends have actually been full of family time and we’ve actually gotten the chance to get even closer and enjoy things together.  Joe and I are trying to keep our wedding budget rather small which means lots of DIY projects rather than buying things premade.  So far we have made boutonnieres, my bouquet, our guestbook and now a homemade batch of wine that will be ready just in time for the wedding.
The boutonnieres were a very quick and easy project.  We bought some vintage keys from The Brass Armadillo (one of our favorite antique shops) and some ivory ribbon.  From there it was as easy as tying a bow.
My bouquet consists of a foam ball, rice lights embedded from the inside of the ball, fabric and fabric pins.  This project has taken some time because we are making the patches of fabric look like small flowers and then we are pinning them into the foam.  Because our wedding is going to be at night I wanted a little bit of light added to my bouquet so the rice lights that we poked through to shine through the fabric give me that.  This project was a little more difficult and is still not complete but my dad has been a huge help with this one.
A few weekends ago I we decided to get cracking on our guest book. I had found this idea on pinterest so we started with that and then it evolved into something so much better.
First we bought seven 3-foot pieces of wood and three 2-foot pieces to make the pallet.  We had a few different ideas on how to get the pieces together and finally decided on using biscuits.  Joe found a biscuit jointer on sale and we bought that and the biscuits to start this project.  My dad helped with some ideas on the best way to use the biscuits and our best plan of attack. Then it was time to drill the slots for the biscuits and then glue them in.

We had to let the biscuits and glue dry overnight so then Sunday we were going to sand and stain the wood.  Joe and my dad got to talking Saturday night and come up with the idea to engrave the heart I was originally going to paint onto the wood. So after sanding the crap our of this wood we found a nice pattern to follow of a heart and dad engraved it. After that was done it was time to stain the wood.

The wood we bought was a red oak that was actually very light in color. Joe and I have always loved a bit of a darker wood feel so we bought some red mahogany wood stain and a few coats of that made it look amazing. Then we sealed it so the stain wouldn’t scratch or anything like that.
The last touch was painting on our last name and our wedding date. After finding the right stencil and color of white paint (who knew there were so many different variations of white) we painted that on. One last coat of sealant and this baby is ready to be written on with paint pens.

Feel free to let me know what you think in the comments below.

Don’t Ever Forget… You’re Worth it

Besides all of the great things that took place today, it was a weird day. The day itself went fine but the date, January 20^th had a bit of a hold on me. Today is my ex’s birthday. And yes I am happily engaged to an amazing man and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with him, but my ex was a huge part of my life for many years before I met my fiancé. My ex is one of the main reasons I am who I am today and I can’t help but want to Thank Him every now and then.

I met my ex on a random day at a Jiffy Lube. I walked in, he was waiting, we talked a bit about what was on the tv and then he left. A few minutes later he came back pretending he had left something and asked for my number. We hung out and talked a bit and I was swept away. I thought I was in love. I thought he was great. I was 18 and naïve.

He was a combat medic in the army national guard and he spent the first year of our relationship in Iraq. We talked marriage and kids and had a whole future planned out. And then he came home.

The changes were slow. Getting mad over something little and making it bigger than it was. Storming out of my room and going for a drive not to return for a few hours. And then I started catching him slip up… texting all the time (not to me since I was sitting next to him), spending more and more time out of the house. Until I caught him exchanging messages with another girl… messages that should not have been shared with anyone but me. Talking about how he couldn’t wait to see her again and how much fun he had with her the other day. Confrontation after confrontation, reconciliation after reconciliation… I was stupid and blind. He would go from “I love you, let’s get married” to “love is a lie and marriage is a trap” in about 10 seconds flat. But I was stupid.

I went along with the charade, thinking like any 19 year old would, that I could change him, that he would wake up and see that he really did want all those things he used to say he did. He admitted to cheating on me on more than one occasion and I forgave him. I said I understood and that it was okay as long as he promised not to do it again. Another lie. I would surprise him after school or work and catch him “hanging out” with another girl. Again I would get upset but eventually forgive him. He would tell me he just needed new friends, and was trying to do that.

After breaking up and not speaking for about 6 months we tried things out again. Same patterns, same issues. I finally reached out to a mutual friend, wondering if maybe all of his actions had something to do with what had happened in Iraq. I didn’t know much but he would say “you don’t know what I’ve seen or done” often so I assumed maybe that was it. The friend told me there wasn’t a lot that happened but maybe he should seek some help.

Now I was stuck. I wanted to follow through and make sure he got the help he needed, so that he could lead a better life. But at 20 years old I had also realized that I deserved better and wanted out. Leaving him again would break his heart and could throw him into a spiral he might not recover from. I was his lifeline for awhile, the only thing he had. I pulled away as gently as I could, staying in his life but not committing. I told him if he wanted me he would have to work on himself and prove it to me.

The truth was I had met someone too… I had met Joe, my fiancé. He had shown me how I was supposed to be treated. He showed me what it was like to be cherished and respected. And I admit it was awkward for me at first, not sure what to do when he reached for my hand in public or sent me cute messages with no harsh undertones. Joe was truly my knight in shining armor who had come to save me from this evil toxic relationship.

When Joe took me out on our first date I realized what I had known for awhile… I was done with my ex, and there was no turning back now. I hung out with my ex the next day hoping to break the news to him. I told him I had met someone and wanted to see where it would go. The next day Joe and I became Facebook official and I received one of the more hateful texts from my ex. It didn’t bother me anymore though. I was done and was happy. I remember even telling him that I could see myself marrying Joe, it was that great with him.

Since then Joe and I have lived our lives together. It’s been just shy of three years and not a word from my ex. He did reach out to me this past November and I did return the message but soon realized he hadn’t changed and there was nothing good that would come of any kind of friendship with him. I have learned. I have Joe. And I am happy.

*Emotional abuse can be hard to see and sometimes it takes someone else to point it out to you. After months of being told by family and friends that things weren’t right with my ex I still stuck around. It took a man to treat me right to wake me up. If you or someone you know is in an emotionally abusive relationship understand that it is hard on all parties but you deserve better, you deserve more and you are worth it.

Life is a Highway

It’s not about where you go but how you get there.  How many times have we heard this in some form or another in our lives?  Have you ever actually thought about how true this is?

This past weekend my fiancé Joe and I decided to go up to Flagstaff and enjoy the fresh snow.  As we embarked on our trip we were full of excitement and were looking forward to playing in the snow, eating at one of our favorite restaurants and enjoying some just us time.  Our excitement came screeching to a halt when only 20 miles into our 150-mile trip up north we hit a traffic backup due to an accident 20 miles ahead.  This was going to be a long day….

We could have been grouchy and complained to each other about how this totally sucked and it was going to take forever to get up there now… we wouldn’t have time for everything we wanted to do… so many things we could have (and probably did mention at least once) complain about.  But instead of dwelling on this, Joe plugged in his iPhone and started playing his playlist he made specifically for this trip.  Starting with some classic good morning songs [It’s a Beautiful Morning by The Rascals and Here Comes the Sun by the Beatles] we were going to enjoy this snail’s paced trip with good tunes.

As the playlist progressed and we gained a few miles I couldn’t help but beam at Joe; he remembered songs I loved that even I had forgotten about.  We were jamming to classics, new songs, oldies, almost any genre and band/group you could think of. Some he would instantly skip because he wasn’t feeling it [or it was meant to be played when we were at a different point in our drive] but others we would air guitar/air drum and even sing along to [Joe was particularly good at the “Bam a Lam” part in Black Betty and we both belted out Life is a Highway].

Finally, after a while, we reached where the accident was and then traffic opened up.  It was a smooth drive from that point on up to Flagstaff.  First stop was the cemetery to see my grandpa.  The cemetery was covered in snow up to my knees!  We uncovered his plaque as best we could but it was deep and the ground was frozen so it was hard.  Then we had lunch at Bun Huggers, which is one of our favorite places to eat in Flagstaff.

After lunch it was off to the snow… that was what everyone else had planned as well.  Traffic was horrible, again.  But we had the playlist Joe made and we just made the best of it.  We talked and told stories and tried to find a nice place to pull off to play.  After what seemed like forever we found a place to park off the side of the road and hiked into the mountain a bit and played.  We made a snowman, snow angels and had a snowball fight.  Mostly we explored… Joe found tracks that he followed for a bit around the area; he thought it was a mountain lion, which made me nervous but then, realized it was a dog on a leash! Haha!  We found a nice open area with gorgeous Aspen trees and took some pictures there.  When we were tired of the snow we trekked back to the car and headed back down to Flag.

Two hours later we were back in Flag… Traffic was again horrible.  But we were definitely entertained on the drive back into town.  We were both tired, I had to use the restroom and we were both getting cranky.  Joe took his shoes off to relax and threw his feet up on the dashboard.  When his feet started fogging up the windows we both lightened up a bit and the entire mood in the car changed.

A quick stop at Walmart and a debate on whether we should stay in Flagstaff for the night or drive home on possible icy roads and we were decided and headed back home. Traffic was not bad this time and we actually got home in decent time. Joe helped me maneuver the roads and made sure we stayed clear of any ice or possibly icy situations and we made it back safe.

I have to say I enjoyed our trip, all parts of it; and yes playing in the snow was definitely nice but I think my favorite part was the one on one time I got with Joe. We were goofy and free and didn’t really care about anything. That to me was the best part of our entire trip and it all took place on the journey to our destination.

Hello 2015

Most people make Resolutions this time of year. “New year, new me” is said all the time but when I thought about my “resolutions” I didn’t think it suited me. I don’t need to change myself or recreate myself; I don’t need to “resolve” anything in my life; I just want to be the best me and live the best way possible.

So instead of resolutions I made goals for 2015. Some of them have a time constraint to be achieved by a specific time during the year of 2015; others are general things I would like to accomplish at some point this year or something to work on throughout the year. Either way they are all things that I believe will help me have a happy and healthy year.

So let’s check them out shall we? [I apologize in advance for the length; I’m a girl with dreams and lots of goals so bear with me as we work through them.]

Financial Goals:

Have all wedding money saved by July 2015
​As most of you know I am getting married this September to the man of my dreams. Although we are pretty simple people and are keeping our wedding pretty low key, everything has a price. We have been buying little things here and there for the wedding and keeping track in our budget so hopefully we can either have everything paid off or all of the money saved up so that we will not be in debt for the wedding when we get married.

Have a $500 Cash Emergency Fund by July 2015
Some people would think this is super easy but with a car loan, student loan and normal spending it can be harder than you think, especially when it’s meant to just be there and only be used in case of emergency!
Open a Joint Account for Wedding Savings and Future Use by July 2015
​Joe and I already have a joint savings account that we have been using to save for our house down payment, however we would like to have a joint checking account that would be our household account for bills and such once we are married. I would like to open this soon so that we can start putting our money we have saved for the wedding in it and start using it as a functional joint account. This one is hard because we both grew up using different banks and we cannot seem to pick one we would like to stick with. I see a pro/con list in our future….

All Debt except for Car and Student Loans paid off by July 2015
​It is nice to be debt free and I would love to start our marriage debt free, but with a car loan and a student loan that is still growing I know that is not possible. I would however like to only have those debts when entering our marriage, so all credit cards need to be paid off by my birthday if not sooner!

Have Half of a Down Payment Saved for our House by September 2015
​With all of the other saving we are doing I thought it was a little far-fetched to have a full down payment ready to go once we’re married so I decided that half was attainable and if we can save more then we do that. Plus, with the price of homes fluctuating, the down payment amount will be changing as well so who knows exactly how much we will need to have saved and by when.

Family Goals:

Schedule family time at least every other weekend
​Joe and I recently introduced my parents and brother to The Place which is an awesome restaurant we like to go to for breakfast. It has already been decided that we would all like to go as a family at least once a month so that helps with this goal. However I would like more time scheduled with my family, so I’m thinking on another weekend out of the month to have a movie night in or even a nice sit down meal at home with everyone.

Schedule at least one date a month
​I recently saw this idea on Pinterest where you preplan and sometimes can prepay dates. You make a binder or box and fill it with envelopes with money for the restaurant, food prep, movie or whatever else the date may entail and a description of what the date is. I’m going to work on making this [so watch for a post in the future about it] and hopefully we can use it all year because spending time together just us is important. –I’m also thinking about making a rule that there will be no wedding talk during these dates. I haven’t gone bridezilla yet but I don’t want to drive Joe nuts with all the talk!

Personal Goals:

Maintain a GPA of 3.5 or higher at GCU
​Working full time and going to school can be a little stressful at times and usually something will suffer when balancing too much. My goal is to maintain a 3.5 GPA or higher at GCU while I am studying accounting and still working full time and planning our wedding. So far I have done well and still have a 4.0 but I know the classes are only going to get harder and I will need to focus and push through to achieve this goal.

Move up at Work
​I recently applied for two positions at work, one is a lead position which is a step up from where I am and the other is a Quality Analyst position which is still in my department but a different sector and would mean a pay raise so either is a step up. My interview for the Lead position is on January 7 and hopefully we will hear soon after if I got the spot or not. If I don’t I will still be striving to work my way up, it just might take a little longer as these positions do not open up very often.

Be at least a Level 2 SCUBA Diver
​I became a certified SCUBA diver in the summer of 2014 and have not gone on a dive since my certification dive. This was mostly because the water has been cold and we haven’t wanted to rent wetsuits. Hopefully when the water warms up Joe and I can get out to get in a few more dives to get me to level 2. I also want to explore more certifications and eventually become an advanced diver, but that can take some time and money so for now it’s a life goal not a goal to accomplish necessarily this year.

Engage More
​I posted this one on my Facebook this morning because it is one that pertains to my relationships with my friends. I follow so many people on Facebook and Instagram, and I like posts left and right but I don’t actually engage with these people. I would like to reach out and interact, comment on things and genuinely learn more about all of my friends. I would also like to carry this into my daily life and try to be more open to making new friends and learning more about people, really getting to know them and hear their stories.

Attend Super Saturday with Becky and Explore Beach Body
​My best friend just recently resigned up as a Beach Body coach and I couldn’t be happier for her. I think the team that she joined is amazing and I believe I would love to be a part of it one day. This would be a huge decision though that requires a lot of thought and research so my goal is to attend as many events as I can with Becky and to do research on my own about Beach Body so Joe and I can make an informed decision together.

Read More
​Specifically read more types of books and more often in general. To do this I found the following book list on Pinterest and have also worked on a list of books that coincide with the list. Look for a post in the near future specifically about this!

Okay kids, I know that was long but I hope it helped you learn more about me and maybe even gave you ideas for your own goals for 2015! Feel free to share your goals with me in the comments, I look forward to hearing all about them!

The True Spirit of the Holidays

Like many, for me the Holidays are about being with family and friends and being thankful for everything that I have. This Christmas however I was having a hard time doing this until I took a step back and thought about everything as a big picture. This was my third Thanksgiving and Christmas with my fiancé and although I knew what I was getting into when he told me his mom was one of eight children I didn’t even think about what that would mean come this time of year.

First of all it meant buying or making more presents than ever. We are both givers and love to see the faces of our nearest and dearest when they open our heartfelt gifts. But to get those heartfelt gifts to them it requires a lot of time, energy and money of course. Last year we were able to spoil Joe’s cousins and our close friends and family with a few gifts each and we also made a Mason jar gift for each household. This year however, with planning a wedding and saving for a house the pressure was on for Joe and I to make ends meet and still give everyone a gift they would love. For that to happen we actually had to cut back… a lot. We didn’t buy nearly as many gifts and we also bought for less individual people. We stuck to immediate family and close friends and still got a few gifts or even a gift card each. I truly don’t know how much money went into Christmas this year, as we tend to buy throughout the year because sometimes that soft cuddly blanket for my mom will never be that good of a price again but I do know it was not as much as last year.

Besides budgeting money for so many people during the holidays, Joe and I also had to budget time. When we first got together in 2012 we talked about how to split the holidays so that it was fair for everyone. We had decided at that time that we would have Thanksgiving with my family and Christmas with his and we could trade off every year or keep it the same but we would always do one holiday with one side and the other with the other side.

This year, as much as we tried and wanted to make everything fair, circumstances made it hard to split the holidays that way and we ended up doing both my family’s thanksgiving dinner and his along with Christmas at my house and his grandma’s.   It was impossible to make both officially because both were starting around 1-2pm so we did our best to split the day. We spent most of Thanksgiving at Joe’s grandma’s house with his mom and a few aunts and a few other friends of his family and made it back to my house just around the time they were bringing the food out for seconds. I was okay with that because as far as I knew we were spending Christmas at my house all day.

I admit, when Joe and I were texting a few weeks before Christmas and he mentioned that his aunt told him to bring a fruit platter over for Christmas I was a little shocked. I expected to stay home all day and spend time with my family. But Joe’s grandma has not been doing well and he told me he wanted to spend as much time with her during these special times as he could. I understood that, and was willing to “sacrifice” time with my family so that he could be with his because I was not going to spend Christmas apart.

At first when Joe and I were talking about the Christmas schedule I was upset, I felt like I was jipping my family time with us and I was jipping myself time with them. I was ultimately being selfish because I wanted what I wanted and didn’t think about his feelings or his family.

But after I thought about everything and really looked at what I would HAVE for Christmas rather than what I would be missing I felt blessed. I essentially have two families, Joe’s and my own; and although they are much too large to fully merge and celebrate together right now I hope within the next few years Joe and I will be able to host Thanksgiving and Christmas at our own home with all of our family together; because, let’s face it kids, that’s the true spirit of the Holidays, togetherness.